Chad's spot for various thoughts, musings, poetry, ideas and whatnot

Sunday, September 21, 2008

So...here's some random thoughts from commercials I've seen...

When a car commercial says their new model is the "roomiest ever" does that mean the car has three rooms now? What would the new rooms be? I mean, there's obviously a driving room but what are the others? Maybe there's a TV room where the DVD player and iPod ports are. What else? Perhaps a powder room for those nights out on the town. What about a kitchen for a little snack on a long trip? Hmmm...what rooms you you like to come as standard equipment on your next car?

Are all creepy hotel desk clerks required to have Northeastern accents? Maybe they're the New England version of a redneck but with an Oxford shirt and sweater instead of a stained "wifebeater" shirt like we have down here in the South.

Is StubHub legalized scalping? And the kid who gets the Viking helmet...is he really a man now? I mean, the ability to control the DirecTV remote is a skill that does separate us from the primates but are we really expected to believe that this kid could heft a broadsword and a round shield and take his place aboard the clan's longship bound for parts here-to-fore unpillaged just because dad gives him a hat with horns? I don't think so.

Did Dan Patrick just say that the kid in the stands on the highlights would need a dose of laxatives after consuming too many Twizzlers during the game? And they pay this guy?

I'm stunned that the banks/brokerage houses are still running commercials. Do they still have any money left? I mean, didn't the US government and we the taxpayers just buy them? If we did I'd like to see less cliche commercials. I mean, honestly, wouldn't you like to see some guy like Sam Waterson get up on you're High-Def and say, "Our core values are greed and rampant stupidity. Our investment advisors thought it would be a good idea to buy a bunch of low grade securities built on mortgages for houses they'd never seen written by guys who attended a one afternoon seminar with an open bar. Our solution...we're flogging those guys in a back room right now and if you open an account with us we'll give you online trading tools and the right to come down to the local office and get a couple of good lashes in. Cruelty, that's our policy."

Once again Microsoft has stolen stuff from Apple. "I'm a PC"? Seriously? First the company thinks we'd be swayed by having Jerry Sienfeld hang out with that laugh a minute comedian Bill Gates and now we get this amazingly creative and original ad campaign that tells us that Gates both uses PC's and wears glasses. And obviously the famous TV pop psychologist isn't a "human thinking". He's using a PC. First Vista, then the Seinfeld commercials and now this. Someone needs an intervention I think.

And that thought I'll bid you good night. Remember to tip your wait staff.

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